It's Justin Bieber's Birthday

I don't know whether I learned it first because it was trending on Twitter or because somebody posted it on Facebook, but today is Justin Bieber's birthday. On Facebook, I saw this post: "My daughter and her bff are acting as if it's their bdays. Balloons, JB Cookies". That is just wrong, very wrong. But, I had to figure out what it is about him that makes people want to celebrate his birthday.


I googled "Justin Bieber lyrics" and it took me to some song called "Baby", which I have had the misfortune of hearing. It says that Justin Bieber was one of the songwriters, so I looked at the lyrics which surely would be so wonderful that it would explain why pre-pubescent girls are celebrating his birthday. Here you go:


And I was like
Baby, baby, baby, ooh
Like
Baby, baby, baby, noo
Like
Baby, baby, baby, ohh
I thought you'd always be mine
Like
Baby, baby, baby, ohh
Like
Baby, baby, baby, noo
Like
Baby, baby, baby, ohh
I thought you'd always be mine


That's it. It's those lyrics. They summarize the meaning of life and that's why Justin Bieber's birthday is on track to become a national holiday here, even though he is Canadian.


Seriously, I understand this kid is pretty talented and even though I hear he cut his hair, I guess he's pretty cute. But, c'mon people. This is a kid whose voice may continue to change. He may turn out like Lindsay Lohan or Charlie Sheen. And, much to the chagrin of millions of screaming tweens, he didn't even win the Grammy for best new artist (it went to Esperanza Spalding, someone who does have significant musical talent).


I guess we've been through this before. There was Elvis. There were The Beatles. And, there have been countless other favorites. But, I grew up with The Beatles, and while there was hysteria (and fainting) when they arrived in New York, there was never a celebration in my class, anyway, of Paul McCartney's birthday.


This scares me. I think it is the current sign that the apocalypse is nearing.


By the way, Justin Bieber IS more talented than Miley Cyrus.